the oscars, as told by twitter.

i, @kylieinthesky, have never watched a televised award show.

i love celebrities.

i love fashion. 

i love movies and music and tv.

but besides about 5 minutes of the 2010 CMA's, i have never seen a televised award show.

#thesearemyconfessions

the oscars on sunday night were no exception. however, in all the post-oscar talk sunday night and monday, i found that i could keep up pretty darn well for not having watched even a second of it. so well, in fact, that i even found myself dominating on the 2014 oscars category of quizup. whaddup.

of course, this is all thanks to twitter, which was overwhelmingly active for about 4 hours sunday night as everyone and their friggin' mom live-tweeted the thing. and ellen, of course. #oscars #blessed

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so i present to you now, the best parts of the oscars through the twitter-lens.

first off, there were an insane amount of selfies taken. including, of course, the selfie that shut down twitter:

and i can attest that it did in fact shut down twitter. my page wouldn't reload for about 20 minutes. this epic selfie is at 3 million retweets so far, which is about 2.2 million more than the next most retweeted tweet, which was from obama after he won the 2012 re-election.

why do i know so many stats about twitter?

and since liza minnelli missed out on the group selfie, she got her own one later on:

i see her and all i see is lucille 2. too much arrested development indoctrination last year.

of course j-law played a pretty present role as well. besides starring in the selfie that shut down twitter, she also tripped out of her limo over a traffic cone.

and since she tripped last year too, this is definitely going to become a thing. 

like...they're bright orange for a reason but....

then jorn tramolto went and introduced adele dazim to the stage to sing the grammy-winning "let it go". 

only neither of those people are real bc john travolta really struggles with reading under pressure, apparently. idk, maybe he's just getting a little old? the point is, he butchered idina menzel's name past the point of recognition.

WTF?!

and twitter still isn't over it:

and neither is the internet bc this also exists now.

and of course there was lupita.
before last night, i didn't even know who lupita nyong'o was. i don't go to a lot of movies on my college budget, and 12 years a slave is rated R, which means i most likely will never see it. but there is no denying that this young woman is flawless:

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twitter also told me, with much sadness and disappointment, that leo dicap left the award show still perpetually-oscarless. 

matthew mcconaughey won instead, and leo made sure to give him a real nice hug as his oscar hopes and dreams were crushed once again.

^^^twitter was nailing it.

and then tumblr tuned in as well, and i died a little:

and of course, we wrapped up the night with a freakin' celebrity pizza party. 

now, if ya'll know anything about me, you know that i love pizza. i love it so hard. and to see brad pitt passing out plates as ellen serves pizza to the most talented actors and actresses in hollywood....like, i'm actually getting emotional thinking about it. ellen is the coolest person to ever live in fame.

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this. this is everything. 

and there you have it. pizza, selfies, lupita, tramolto, and leo the bridesmaid. everything twitter taught me about the 2014 oscars. 

over and out.
totally posted